my room..

weee.. my room is much more pretty na!

it's the way i pictured it..
although it's not that done yet.. but it's improved..
ready na xa para kay skye in a sense..

light..
blinking and glowing ones..

it's a bit messy still..
but it's the way it should be..
atleast i can find my stuffs within the mess..

i don't know where to put skye there though..
it's a bit cramped..
tas matakot ako mahulog xa like what happened to toph..
he fell from the double decker last week and again early this morning from his bed..

it was a loud..

BOOG!
wah! wah! waH! mama! mamy!

i got all shaken up coz skye was doing something weird!
like stiffening too much na it hurts and i went all tachycardic!!
like my heart was pumping 400 times more.. pumping adrenalin to my body..
hahahaha
honestly..
it was much more scary than the kikiks gammy and lhey talked about..

damn them..
speaking of kikiks..

it made a big mark on the upcoming samal escapades..
madami daw dun?!
hai.. sayang..

edit ko lang to later..
i'm a bit beat up..

.skye.thorn.smoke.eden.wings.

everything in one book..
darn..

i have been dreaming of you for the past days..

it was always the.. back to the old days dream..
nung mga araw na ala ka magawa.. at ibang makita kundi ako..
hahaha..
pathetic..
god i f*ckin' miss you..

and you go txtn me out of the blue that you miss me too..

but you go again with the dissing and throwing me away like i was some old rubbish you couldn't stand..

and there goes my support system..

i hope you know..
that the one person you hate most in my life..
the one bestfriend who's been keeping me sane..
said things that shocked me..

damn it..

sabi pa nya sana maayos to..
kasi skye deserves a father..
and na we have to patch this up..

coz she doesn't want me keeping skye from you!


because i was so f*uckin' pissed off with you that i told her you won't see even skye's shadow and anyway.. you don't believe in skye..

i didn't expect that from her..
but i always thought she was well above me..
and you hate her.. and want to kill her..

ala ka na nga sa life ko..
ala ka na kay skye..
and you want her out of my life too?!

you want me to go crazy..
beyond repair?!
how crazy do you want me to be..

you are as free as air to flow..
hinayaan kita to do everything..


the few friends that i want to have for myself.. you wish gone..



can't you see how good and forgiving my friends are..

they are but a few..

because the one friend i thought who'd be the best among them turns his back on me.. leaving me alone..

go on.. do your thing..


and

sana.. you can produce a straight answer..
you always turn deaf and mute when i ask you what you want.. from me..

hahaha..
suyaa atoh na tx oi..
you wake up dawn..
you get a msg from the person you're waitin' but hatin' to text..
and..
you don't know if it was cowpoop..

endless?!

and the cycle goes on..

this one's for you..

you know who you are..
happy now?!

we both have an issue between us we have to find a solution to..

i know what i want.
i know what you want.

d ko alam kng ano at alin dun sa mga lumabas sa bibig natin ang dapat
pairalin..

we both know the sane parts of it..
you agreed with it too..

pero alam mo na just saying the few bits of words..
although di mo alam ano yun..
would end this turmoil.

matalino ka..
magulo lng isip mo..

d ko man alam kung maicp mo na sa akin ka..
pero kung indi man..
dli man ko mamugos..

k nahihirapan din ako intindi..

kilala bitaw kita..

libog au imong utok..

sabi ka lang gud kung anhin toh..
disregard me sa decision..

k if you want this..
d man ako magpalag..

kng gusto mo.. at masaya ka sa decision mo..

sus..
d kita pahirapan..

KELAN BA KITA PINAHIRAPAN?!

endless man din..


mag.decide ka para makadecide ako..

and kung ndi na tlga xa magwork for you..

sabihan mo ako asap.

tas delete mo num ko after..

shut.off mo na lang ako sa mundo mo.

i'd appreciate it..


pero yung last na usapan/iyakan..
kng ano man cnabi ko dun..
yun tlga yun..

naicp ko man na ganun reaction mo..
di ko lang naready sarili ko na mag.agree ka..


it's either we're in this together..
or not..

sabihin mo lang..

alam mo man na hindi ako manhid..

tama na ui.. mahaba na ito.. mura bayag endless pud ang character ani..

ingat lagi.

you keep buggin' me.. you can't not have me.. and you can't lose em either.. ok.. i compromise.. coz i'm not selfish. i don't wanna be the bad one..

you know the deal.. i don't make you choose over me and your barkada unless you go gangstah and playah again.. and you tell me what the **** is happenin' when somethin' is happenin' .. you say yes..

the thing is.. magaling ka lang kung tayo lang.. pero kung andyan sila.. you wanna show them na kaw ang boss.. yes you are the boss of yourself.. but you go overboard..

i let you have your barkada.. eventhough they talk sh*t bout me and call me names.. ok.. you go callin' every other b*tch pet names.. twas ok.. but really honey.. it's so old news..

but you don't let me have my barkada.. it's always "anu ginagwa nyo?" .. i don't do what you do.. if that's what you mean.. i don't go doing anyone when they offer me whatever they offer me.. AND I DON'T HELL WANNA KILL ANYONE WHO CALLS ME NAMES!!

you don't go pointing your gun on my friends.. atleast do me that favor.. you and your friends have called me worst names than anyone.. but i don't go and pull a gun or attack them just because they did..

you're getting low.. and you're better than that..
i know you and some of your friends are..

you want me to back off them.. pwede.. as long as you do your part..

and i you know i know you know what i'm talkin' about..

you push me away and pull me back everytime you feel threatened..

it can't always be that way

wah! modelling as a career?! definitely..

someone ask me if i was interested.. ofcourse.. who isn't?!

but he was fraudish.. and i ain't fallin for his crap.. and he was the one who got pissed?! a.hole! azif!


anyways..
watched gg ep.14.. i believe i am the first of my gg friends who's seen it.. coz if they've already seen it.. they'd be all the buzz of it.. hahaha..
although i hated it for not being by the book at first.. i can't help it.. chuck bass was as horny.ish as i thought he was.. and he has the right to be..

i can't stop thinking of him.. ooops.. B. should be doing the "wet dreams" blog about him.. coz S. is for D. .. hahaha..

-=flight of ideas mode=-

my b-day is coming up.. i'm not really excited about it.. coz.. it's a busy day.. a very busy day.. got review..